Being a mother has been her greatest desire.

At 46, single and without a partner, she opted for IVF from a sperm donor, regardless of what society thinks about her decision.

She said, if you’d told the 16-year-old me that at 46, I’d be divorced, single, and having a baby on my own—by choice!— I’d have shuddered and firmly said, “No!” Back then, I had very definite ideas about the future course my personal life would take, and it didn’t look like this.

I imagined something way more straightforward and, dare I say it, conventional.

I’ve been blessed to build the career of my dreams over decades as a journalist—13 years on air for CNN International, traveling the world to cover global events and interviewing presidents, movie stars, and world leaders. I published a book, became a UN Goodwill Ambassador, and started a nonprofit to help empower African girls, but in my quiet moments, the one thing I wanted the most—to become a mother—remained out of reach.

When I got cancer, no one told me how to tell my kids. Here’s how I did it:

A brief marriage to a kind man didn’t result in children, and then the year I turned 40, my mom had a catastrophic stroke, leaving me no emotional space to contemplate anything other than caring for her. Six years went by, and a few months ago I found myself in a subpar relationship with a man who took about 12 hours to reply to all my texts, among other red flags. It was then, in the aftermath of our inevitable breakup, that it hit me: Not having a child would be the greatest regret of my life.

And with my biological clock ticking down, if I were waiting for the right man to come along before I did it, well, I might just find myself out of time.

In the aftermath of our breakup, it hit me: Not having a child would be the greatest regret of my life. If I was waiting for the right man to come along before I did it, well, I might just find myself out of time.

So, I decided to take control of my life and settle on the bravest and scariest decision I have ever made: to have a baby on my own. I had many long conversations with myself and tried to get to grips with questions about what it would mean to not have the support of a partner, both emotionally and financially.

How would I handle society’s questions?

What would being a single parent mean for my child?

I still don’t have all the answers, but I decided to take the leap because I refuse to let fear, social conventions, or judgment hold me back from seeking this joy.

Culled from Today (Isha Sesay’s story)

But who would have thought that the beautiful lady who was always smiling to the camera for the world was going through her low moments?

This is the story of many people, agonizing in silence yet smiling for the world.

I hope her story inspire other people to make difficult decisions of their lives too.